i give up.

I caved in.

And finally bought a new laptop. Now I just need to figure out how I will retrieve all of my music and photos and documents from my now dead laptop. I'm hoping it will magically come alive again later like it did last time so that I can get stuff off of it. Otherwise, I will cry.

LA half marathon 2010

The inaugural LA half marathon has been conquered! I set another PR this month and finished in 1:56:59...finally reaching my goal to break 2hrs. It was an awesome course despite the hills ( hey, at least there were downhills to compensate!) and it was fairly well organized considering it was the first one. The weather couldn't have been better...a little sunny at times, but it was still cool enough that it wasn't miserable. Plentynof runners in Elvis costumes too...which always helps with the laugh factor. I started off the race too fast (why I still make that mistake I don't know) so I know a negative split is out of the question. But, I'm okay with that...Just another lesson for next time! I think I may run in this race again next year! Half marathons really are an awesome distance. Felt great after the race and felt no pain...a far difference from when I run in fulls!

I tried posting a picture of luci and the medal, but I can't post pictures from my iPad for some reason...bummer

I miss you

The Portland Cream donut from Voodoo Donuts:



This meal tied with the pho food cart I ate at in the Pearl District. This meal is from Nong's Khao Man Gai. I can't describe how delish this simple Thai dish is:


I also miss you Rogue...this is the Morimoto Soba Ale:

Portland Marathon 2010

First off I want to say I LOVE YOU PORTLAND. I even might come back to run in your marathon again...because I LOVE YOU THAT MUCH. Please just don't rain the entire race next year :)

I had a great race this past Sunday at the Portland Marathon. I knew I would be running in colder weather than San Diego, but nothing prepared me for running a marathon in 55 degrees in the rain. Didn't Portland get the memo from me that I grew up in Hawaii (hardly rains) and live in San Diego (also hardly rains)?!?!? Geez...My socks and shoes were soaked even before the start of the race, and I knew that was bad sign...

It took me about 20 minutes to physically cross the start line...and the first 5 miles were so crowded and I was watching my feet to make sure not to trip on anyone. The first 5 miles are always my least favorite because most people (myself included no doubt) dash out hopped up on adrenaline, so keeping a decent pace is difficult to say the least. This time around, I decided that I was determined to run a smarter race and force myself to start off slow so that I would be able to finish strong(er) than the RockNRoll marathon.

It was awesome to run in a different city than I normally train in and get to see all the different neighborhoods. I probably would have enjoyed it a lot more had it not been so cold and wet. I was continually amazed at all the volunteers and spectators that still had huge smiles and loads of support for the runners despite the weather. The entire time I was running I was thinking, which is better, running in heat or in the rain? I've now done both and I think my answer is rain. I feel for all the Chicago marathoners!!!

Anyways, a large portion of the course was through a pretty industrial area...not much to report there. The course was also relatively flat with several rolling hills (all of which felt like were in the 2nd half of the marathon...of course!) Crossed several bridges, which provided for some amazing scenery and ran through many a small neighborhoods where all the residents came out of their homes holding cups of coffee and cheered us on.

I felt fantastic and was running on target up until Mile 21 (actually surprised I felt good until then to be honest) and that's when I hit The Wall. The dreaded Wall. When I hit the wall I started walking whenever I came up to an aid station so that I could give my legs a short break. Mile 22-26 were seriously the longest four miles I have ever ran in my entire life. It felt longer than the 1st half of the course!

But, I came around a corner in downtown Portland and saw the finish line and thought HALLELUJAH Warm Shower here I come! I didn't have any strength left in my legs to sprint to the end (though in retrospect I wish I had). Finished the race in 4hr 22minutes...10 minutes faster than my RnR time from June. I am happy with my time, but now it's making me want to run another one to see if I can beat this time. hahaha

And the best part of running in this particular marathon was that I ran with Team Portland's Marathon for the Cure and was able to raise over $1,300 for the Susan G Komen Foundation. At the points in the race where I felt like utter shit and questioned why I volunteered to run 2 marathons within a four month span the only thing that kept me going were my supporters.

I couldn't have done it without them.

Life is not getting easier...though i had high hopes that it would. I feel like I am a hamster stuck in the my little hamster wheel and I feel the same emotions repeatedly. I am trying so hard to move on, but with each step I take forward, it only seems like I fall back two steps. I am so grateful that through this all I have friends that will sit there with me and listen to me, my dog Luci who will unconditionally love me and that I have running to help clear my thoughts and anxiety. It's hard not to feel like things are my fault, even though rationally I know that it was not all my fault. It hurts to see that he has moved on so quickly with his life while I am left here struggling to keep mine together. I hear certain songs on the radio, eat certain foods, come across various pictures and they all remind me of "us". I have never been this heartbroken before and I really don't know what to do to make myself feel better.

I want to feel whole again. I want to be happy again. I just want to stop being so sad.

Hydration

So I should be hydrating for my upcoming race this weekend...AFC Half Marathon...yet instead I find myself consuming beer.

Cheers :)

and she lives!

I've been lagging in the blogging department.

Partially due to laziness, and partially due to a hectic schedule. Started taking Japanese to brush up on my reading/writing once a week. Put in my two weeks at my current job (last day is this friday) and will be starting my new job next week!

Still running, still training for the Portland Marathon. In fact, I'm currently in the top three fundraisers for the Marathon For The Cure Team Portland! Still have two months to go!

Its been a while

Mon Ami, I've been away for a few weeks...maybe it's only really been a couple of days, but it seems like a long time.

R's been in Chicago since last week Monday for work and I miss him dearly. He's been texting me and sending me pictures of all the delicious food he's consuming...trying to make me jealous! hah!

Luci's diarrhea problem came back this past weekend (I'm assuming b/c she had finished her 3rd round of Flagyl a few days prior). Called my vet tech/soon-to-be veternarian friend and another friend in a panic b/c there was blood in her (extremely) soft stool on Saturday. Also left a semi-choking voicemail at Luci's vet office (they were closed for the day) and called the Vet ER and definitely cried a little while explaining the situation. She's had diarrhea on and off (on after the Flagyl wears off or if she's not on it and off when she's on the Flagyl) for the past two months (ie, since I took her to boarding that one time when our building was being termite tented!!!) Fasted her on Saturday evening and started feeding her white rice & chicken since Sunday. Felt panicked the entire weekend.

So she's been on that steady diet of white rice and chicken...and FINALLY had two decent (yet very small) solid poops yesterday (I did yell Hooray! in public when this happened) and also picked up a HUGE bag of Z/D from the vets (unfortunately this was the only size they had) The vet is hoping that this all points to a (severe) food allergy since the diarrhea stopped once I started feeding her white rice & chicken.

What's strange about all of this is that Luci was already on a high quality kibble (D/D...for her sensitive skin)!

I just want my wee lil' fur baby's tummy to feel better. Her energy level has remained high this entire time...but I assume feeling squirmish in her tummy is no fun (definitely not fun for me either).

Doesn't help that I have hypochondriac tendencies and want to take her to the vet for EVERYTHING IMMEDIATELY. My wallet has not thanked me at all this year.

Keep your fingers crossed for her :)

San Diego-a-go-go...2010 San Diego Rock N Roll Marathon

Accomplished and fully rocked! I have lost my marathon virginity and loved every minute of it (well, that may be a slight overexaggeration)

I had my doubts going into the race knowing that everyone was saying how hot today was going to be (record heat and humidity compared to recently or something like that). But it didn't really start to get hot until I had reached around mile 10.

Started off the race in Corral 19-20 with a pace of 10:15 min/mile...I figured I could run that for 3-5 miles and then I could pick it up. Accomplished that much, and then accidentally picked up the pace too much so that I was running a 9:15-9:30min/mile which I knew I would not be able to maintain for the whole race. But ended up running at that pace for a good 3-4 miles since I was trying to keep up with my friends (3 faster running males!...bad idea!)

Once we made it to the 163 (awful freeway that is majorly banked...and long...and at an incline...for 3 miles) I had to take it back down on my pace. This is where it started to get majorly hot. It didn't help that because the freeway is long, I could see miles and miles of people ahead of me (literally).

But this time we were at mile 11 or something, and I had vaguely remembered R saying that he would be at Mile 11. But he was hanging out with his coworker (who's wife was running the half...slightly different course), so I couldn't remember if he went Mile 11 on the half course or Mile 11 on the full course. Scanned and scanned for his sweet face, but couldn't find him. Eventually found him and his friend on Mile 11/15 (half/full) and couldn't be more thrilled. Filled up my water bottle with fluids I brought from home (the course was supplying something I had never drank before and didn't want to upset my stomach). And then kept on going.

I'll admit, by this time thoughts running in my head were: "Why am I doing this? Am I crazy? Oh wait, I must be crazy because I signed up for the Portland Marathon too! Are we there yet? Is my sports bra tan getting worse? Why is it so hot!!!" haha. But hearing the crowds cheering all the runners on and listening to all the live bands playing pushed me forward.

Once I got to Mile 19 I knew I was on the home stretch (albeit a long stretch). I had ran that part of the course numerous times, so I thought it would be easy...specially considering it was super flat! But no, I was wrong. We ran around Mission Bay and onto Fiesta Island. The loop around Fiesta Island was, I don't know, like 3 miles or something...but it felt more like 8. The number of bands and onlookers on the island were lacking, and it made it difficult to push through. But I told myself I KNEW I could run 4 miles and it would just require me to take things one step at a time. Oh yeah, and I had somehow managed to pick up a small pebble in my right shoe around Mile 16 or something and I couldn't get myself to stop to untie my shoe and take it out. So I ran with it in there until the end.

Once I hit Mile 24 (I think this was on Fiesta Island towards the end), I could taste victory (but only a little. hahah). This is where I think I may have hit a wall (I guess I should be happy that it hit so late in the race). I kept running (only walked when I came upon the aid stations throughout the race), albeit slowly (maybe 10:45-11:00/mile) but I told myself running slow was better than walking being so darn close to the finish. MAN I WANTED TO WALK SO BAD. My legs were building up so much lactic acid and that darn pebble hurt by this point. I could feel myself loosing steam and salt.

Finally came upon the last aid station (0.8mi from the finish line)...it was glorious! The volunteers kept on chanting 0.8mil from the finish! 0.8 mile from the finish! And I was like YES SWEET JESUS I LOVE YOU! But let me tell you, that was longest 0.8 mile I HAVE EVER RAN IN THE ENTIRE HISTORY OF MY RUNNING HISTORY. hah!

Came around a corner, saw a tent and thought "yes! That must be the finish!" but it turned out there was another 0.2 miles to go (talk about mirage!). Forced my legs to lengthen their strides and propelled myself to the finish line!

You know I threw my arms up when I crossed that finish line! I am very happy with my time of 4hr 32 minutes 6 seconds...I couldn't have asked for a better first marathon experience. Like with other races I have ran, I see areas that need improvement (ie, my 1st half pacing) for future races, but I finished today looking forward to running the Portland Marathon!

(I admit though, I cried just for a brief second when I saw R at the finish because I was SO sore, relieved & happy to have finished. And yes, I am currently still sore!)

Go Long, Go Strong!

On the homestretch....

Ran my last "long" run (7 miles) before the big (1st) marathon this afternoon. The marathon is next week Sunday! This coming week I am focusing on Hydrating, hydrating and properly fueling my body. I'm currently trying to decide whether or not I want to run with my hydration belt on race day. I'm so accustomed to running with it already on longer runs, so I might as well...but at the same time I know there are hydration stations about every 1.5 miles or so on the race course.

I convinced R to request Sunday off from his work so that he can come cheer me and my runner friends along the course. I'm sure it's not that exciting for a non-runner to watch a race...let alone a marathon (for a slow runner like me!) but i KNOW I will need to hear his voice and see his smile towards the end of the race to push me to the end. It would be even better if R could bring Luci to cheer with him...

It's crazy the excitement I am feeling inside to run this race...I don't know if I'll feel that way during the actual race. hah! I feel prepared...but my only concern is that I'll let the adrenaline blow my pace at the beginning of the race. (Please keep me on track Garmin!) Lots of visualization and meditation exercises are to be done this week :)

21

That's how many miles we ran last weekend. twenty-one.

Even after having ran that many miles, it sounds crazy to me. And then I realize that I will be running five more on top of that twenty-one in a few weeks. Reality has started to sink in, excitement is starting to build up and of course that lingering feeling of anxiety about race day.

Last week Saturday's run was by no means easy. I started the run feeling fantastic and feeling light on my feet. Then my stomach started hurting around mile 7-9. Mid-way around miles 13-16 I started giving into my mental conscious telling me that I wouldn't finish, I hadn't had a big enough of a breakfast (ate a bowl of oatmeal) and that there was still a long ways to go. My pace group had sped off in the distance (I had taken a little bit longer at the aid station then they had...and of course I HAD to stop to pet the adorable silver beef cake pit bull named Dozer along the way) and I found myself on the route alone...AGAIN. (The last time we had ran this route, I had also lost my pace group & ended up running the last 9 miles of a 16 miles run alone)

I literally had to tell myself out loud "One foot in front of another S, you can do this". Feelings of giving up crossed my mind...albeit briefly. I was reminded how mentally tough you need to be to run long distances. It's easy to give up (maybe a little TOO easy sometimes)...but in the end, I always crave that feeling you get when you cross the finish line & finish (Victory!). We're now heading into taper mode. (But really, is it tapering if you're still running 11 miles on a Saturday?!?! hahaha) I bought a new pair of running shoes and am breaking them in before The Big Day.

This year has been pretty memorable for me thus far...
Passed the CPA exam after how many years of studying & taking exam sections
Bought my first place
and now, I am looking forward to adding my lifelong goal of running in a marathon to the list.

I really can't wait!

And we're back...sort of.

I got my laptop up and running again...in a janky sort of way. I borrowed our old roommate's computer monitor and hooked it up to my laptop. My laptop screen is still black, and eventually I'll need to either fix it or upgrade to a new laptop, but at the moment that seems like an unnecessary expense (esp after my most recent dental visit...super expensive to re-fill four fillings yo!...and we had to get the garage door re-keyed the other day...which was unexpected)

Anyways, it's nice to have my laptop alive again.

We recently ate at Jyoti Bihanga...it's this vegan/vegetarian restaurant down the street from where we live. It's run by Sri Chinmoy practitioners, and they are all super mellow and friendly. Must be from all the meditation!

Anyways, I had hibiscus mint ice tea to drink...



And the NeatLoaf Sandwich for my lunch. I generally like vegetarian/vegan alternatives (R not so much) so I gobbled up my meal happily:




R had the curry...I think it had mock chicken in it. It also came with a carrot ginger soup (which was light and refreshing), but I failed to take a picture of it before R consumed it all. I think he was afraid that I was going to eat it all in my "one bite" that I requested. hehe (he always teases that I consume all the food in the house while he is gone and threatens to hide the groceries so that he can have some. hah!)



I'd like to go back and try the other things on the menu. There are a lot of options to choose from and the atmosphere of the restaurant is really relaxing and peaceful. I also love that we can walk there!

And we're counting down...3...2...1...

Blast off!

Well, no not really. But we are counting down the weeks, days, hours, until the San Diego Rock N Roll M.A.R.A.T.H.O.N. on June 6, 2010.

A few weekends ago I ran in the La Jolla Half Marathon (beautiful coastal views...then a nice TWO-MILE UPHILL up Torrey Pines Road). I clocked in at 2hr 11min (and something seconds, but I forget exactly)...definitely not my best time (again!) (remember I also bombed San Dieguito when I had a foot problem/injury/malfunction) but I'm well on my way to reaching my 2010 Triple Crown goal. Apart from the miserable two-mile uphill (on mile 7 in the race, of course. hah!), it had the potential of being an OK race. The course was too narrow for the amount of people in it, and I felt that the race never thinned out like how it usually does. I hate feeling like I'm going to step on someone's heels when I'm running. I'm sure people don't enjoy hearing me pant behind their backs either (haha, wind-blocking for me sucka!) Then there was also that 1-mile downhill (which you would think would be nice especially towards the end of the race), but actually turned out to be a pain on my knees due to the angle. Oh, and then there was the one man on mile 12 I saw on the side of the road by one of the water stands receiving CPR because he had a heart attack...and then running 50 yards down the road and seeing another middle-aged man receiving CPR from the paramedics for also suffering from a heart attack. After I saw those two men on the side, I lost all desire to run in that race. It was an awful sight, and almost felt surreal. I felt guilty for having continued running, but I'm not sure what more I could have done had I stopped. FORTUNATELY for these two men, there were many random physicians and nurses who were RUNNING in the race and were at the right place and time to help them out. God only knows what would have happened otherwise.

After seeing that, I was reminded of the importance of learning to listen to my body during my runs...whether they are short or long, on cold or hot days. These men didn't look 'unhealthy' or 'unfit', just average (like me). I'm assuming they pushed themselves too hard under the adrenaline and competitive nature of racing. It was a tough course (even seasoned runners told me how tough the course was beforehand!)...Pacing oneself is key...in racing and in life!

So this month, I really have to keep myself on track with my eating habits, hydrating myself and getting enough sleep. I am excited and nervous about the marathon, but am amazed at how far I have come in my running. It's hard to imagine that I used to be terrified of the half marathon but have now come to the point where I can run them without fear (they're no walk in the park though, hahaha). Maybe one day I'll feel that way about a marathon too :)

A mini getaway

My laptop is still down :(

Last week we had our building termite tented so we all had to vacate the building for 3 days...R & I stayed in a hotel a few miles away. It was really weird to be 'vacationing' in your own city..even weirder that I still had to go to work! (Lucky R had those days off anyways) Unfortunately, the hotel didn't accept dogs, so I had to board Luci for a few days.

After her first night at boarding, she sent me an email detailing all the fun she was having without us and sent me a picture of her:



It also helped that our friend, C, works at the boarding facility a few days a week...and it just so happened she was there during Luci's stay! I'm sure Luci was ecstatic to see her...especially after C let Luci play in the yard with the hose (Luci loves playing with the water coming out of hoses). So, thank you C for the extra TLC! She was so exhausted when I picked her up on Saturday (even cuter is that when I picked her up, she was swimming in the doggie pool!)! My theory is that she stayed up all night every night swapping scary stories with the other doggies in boarding and didn't get much sleep.

We missed her so much! And I think it's safe to say that R, Luci, and I are all happy to be back home :)

dead.

my laptop is dead. It turns on, but the monitor is black. I can hear it working, but the monitor still remains black...I think it's the video card...using R's Mac right now...but but but

ALL OF MY PICTURES ARE ON MY LAPTOP! :(

I surrender

There are days where I just feel like throwing in the towel and giving up.

Today was one of those days.

San Diego-a-go-go...in New York!

Just came back from a refreshing long weekend in New York spent enjoying the company of my good friends (from back "home") and exploring some good eats around town. Conclusion: There is not enough time to eat all the good foods offered in this city.

At Xie Xie (not your average Vietnamese sandwich shop)...this is my friend C's Sweet Glazed Pork sandwich


My Vietnamese BBQ Beef sandwich...it was epic:


My friend works in front of a building that has a DESSERT TRUCK parked out in front!!! AMAZING. How she doesn't eat from the truck every single day at every single chance she gets never ceases to amaze me. Here is a pumpkin whoopie pie...bite size. Not too sweet, but hits the sweet spot nonetheless:



We spent some time at MoMA, though we didn't get a chance to look at the Tim Burton exhibit (it was sold out!)



We were puzzled by the works of Marina Ambrovich:


There was a lot of naked bodies involved with her exhibits. We even ventured through the one exhibit which had us walk inbetween two naked women in a hallway. I was afraid that I was going to graze them. While our one friend N just looked one of the women straight in the eye while walking inbetween them. How brave! You can't imagine how uncomfortable it made me feel...

Back to the food...At Inoteca in East Village...an assortment of bruschetta:


Considering this was a tapas restaurant, we left feeling quite satisfied. This was the octopus and garbanzo beans:


Prosciutto panini:


Thai Delivery from Land Thai...I'm blown away at how many things can be delivered in New York. I feel like I would never leave my home. All this food for $60!


A ginormous chocolate chip walnut cookie from Levain's bakery. The dough pre-baking was the size of a baseball. It was beautiful:


We also went to the Spotted Pig for brunch:


My cubano sandwich:


C's burger with roquefort cheese and shoestring potatoes (the neverending MOUND):


N's corned beef and hash with poached eggs:


Mini Cupcakes from Baked by Melissa...I AM OBSESSED with mini cupcakes! I had the red velvet and also a mint chocolate chip one:



Saw an awesome performance called Streb Slam in Brooklyn. A combination of gymnastics and dance and acrobatics...it was cool to say the least:



Also ate at Otto's:
Ramp's pizza:


BUCCATINI AL' AMATRICIANA (hollow spaghetti and crispy pork cheek):



Also had an anchovy pizza:


For dessert I had a triple gelato...Olive Oil, Guiness Stout (OH SO GOOD), and Pistachio!

Spring into Spring...

with a Burger Bar Party!

This is actually from a few weeks ago, but living in San Diego, are there really seasons? :P hehe

Check out the view from our friend's new condo in Little Italy. She has a kick ass community roof top BBQ area in the building:




Yummy vanilla bean cupcakes from Trader Joes, complete with sprinkles:



I sneaked a small piece before eating my lunch (don't tell my mom!)


More yummy goods from Trader Joes...the broccoli salad:


Hey, where are the burgers??? After all, it was a burger party, right?

An assortment of toppings for the burger bar:


More toppings:


I loaded my turkey burger:


It was a fantastic way to spend a Sunday...friends, food, good times :)

San Diego-a-go-go...The Naked Cafe

Oh my god...YUM!

The Naked Cafe is my new favorite breakfast joint.

Blackberry-Banana pancakes:
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I'm ready for my closeup:


The Yin and Yang (roasted potatoes, black beans, avocado, jalapeno peppers, tomatoes and salsa served with a tortilla):


It really hit the spot.

The Big Buff Breakfast burritos:


The Transcendence Wrap with a big heap of quinoa:


Dear Naked Cafe,
I will be back for more!
Love,
Me

My Sweet 16

Had our first "training" (ie, ridiculously long) run this past Saturday where we ran 16 miles. We ran through five coastal cities in San Diego (Oceanside, Carlsbad, Leucadia, Encinitas and Solana Beach)...such a scenic and beautiful run! I wish I had brought my camera. Saw the ocean for miles and miles. Helped to take my mind off of the fact that we were putting on some serious miles on our legs.

My pace group sped off into the distance (they always run faster than the actual pace set for the group!), so I ended up running about 9 miles alone! I really should have just waited for the pace group behind me so that I would have people to run with, but I just wanted to keep going.

Man it was tough. It didn't help that I had to go straight into work, because I was in dire need of a nap. Also discovered that I have a knot in my calf. How do you get a knot in your calf?

I can already tell that the last 10 miles is not going to come easy. But I will not give up!

Make yourself at home

Luci's making herself right at home on our new sofa...Glad she approves :) Gotta keep the lady of the house happy!

Happy Saint Patrick's Day!

Luci snoring is the cutest thing ever. I could watch her sleeping for hours on end...

Today's after work happiness was organizing all of our takeout menus in one binder grouped by genres...and creating a separate binder for all of our appliance/gadget manuals.

Tomorrow I will tackle the ethics exam! I swear.

It's a bummer that I can never really celebrate St. Patrick's day seeing as how it's R's most favorite holiday...why does it always fall on a weekday???

Isn't it funny how the simplest things in life make you the happiest? Today's happiness stemmed from getting glass jars to put pasta in. :)

Home

The view out the window isn't the greatest...but I love that we have this cute window in the kitchen...it lets in quite a bit of light during the day too and a nice breeze when it's open. Annnnnnnnd I can finally put flowers in the window sill :)

I'm currently battling with the carpet...look at how dirty it is! (The place came like that...) If it weren't for the dirtiness, the carpet would be really nice and comfy. I think I will eventually replace it, but for now, it'll have to do. So I'm trying my best to get the dirt out with my little Bissell...

Manic Monday

Got the keys to my first place today!

Scary and exciting all at once